The Most Underrated Skill in Poker: Your Relationship with Money

The Most Underrated Skill in Poker: Your Relationship with Money

When we talk about poker skills, topics like strategy, patience, and decision-making often take center stage. But there’s one skill that rarely gets the attention it deserves, even though it profoundly impacts every poker player’s game: your relationship with money.

Take a moment and ask yourself: What is my relationship with money?

This question isn’t as straightforward as it might seem. It’s not something you can answer with a casual “It’s great!” unless you’ve spent significant time reflecting and understanding the nuances of your emotions and beliefs around money. For most people, their relationship with money is complex—shaped by their upbringing, experiences, and internalized societal pressures.

The Emotional Side of Money

You might feel secure and abundant if you grew up surrounded by wealth, but at the same time, there could be an underlying fear or pressure to prove yourself—to your parents, your peers, or even to society. This fear can manifest as anxiety about losing money, a drive to win at all costs, or a need to validate your worth through financial success.

As a poker player, these emotions can influence how you approach the game. When you think about winning or losing money, what feelings arise? Do you feel excitement, fear, or anxiety? How does it affect your mind and body?

Awareness is the First Step

Understanding your relationship with money begins with awareness. Observe your thoughts and emotions when money is involved. For example, if you feel a deep fear of not proving yourself to your parents, take the time to explore its origins. This might mean reflecting on your past experiences—perhaps you felt validated only when you excelled in school or met certain expectations.

Cultivating a Healthier Dynamic

Once you’ve identified the root of these feelings, the next step is healing and reconditioning your mind. This involves self-compassion and affirming your value, regardless of external achievements.

For instance, if your fear stems from a need to prove yourself, remind yourself:

• I am valuable, even if I don’t meet others’ expectations.
• I am lovable, even if I don’t succeed.

By embodying these affirmations, you begin to dissolve the insecurities tied to money. Suddenly, thoughts like “What if I don’t win?” lose their power. You’re no longer trapped in the past or anxious about the future. Instead, you find yourself present in the moment—a mindset that all top poker players strive for.

Being Present at the Poker Table

The best poker players aren’t weighed down by fear, insecurity, or the need to prove themselves. They operate in the present moment, unburdened by the past or projections of what might go wrong. Achieving this presence requires addressing and resolving the deeper emotions tied to your relationship with money.

Take the First Step

If you want to elevate your poker game—or your life—start by asking the hard question: What is my relationship with money? Then, dive deeper. Observe, reflect, and heal. By cultivating a healthier dynamic with money, you not only improve your game but also gain a sense of freedom and clarity that extends beyond the poker table.

It’s not just about making money; it’s about transforming how you relate to it. And that transformation starts with you.